Usually when someone asks ‘What’s your biggest phobia?’, a ‘normal’ response is spiders, wasps, snakes or anything that’s not remotely furry. But, mine however is most definitely goats.
Yes, I can already imagine there are a few of you reading this and chuckling to yourself thinking: “goats?! Is she mad?”
Come on - really? It’s not that strange and they ARE NOT cute.
I have a feeling my phobia started right from birth. I reckon that more than likely if I had been shown a goat from the minute I left the womb it’d have me in tears. Even before going to the zoo I have to make it quite clear before even wheeling through the gates, that I am NOT going into the goat pen, goat enclosure, goat hut, or ANYTHING remotely goat related.
I mean, you’ve got to admit goats stink - just the thought of the smell is turning my stomach and making me want to vomit all over my keyboard. Not only that, their horns, they’re too freaky. I’ve heard the “oh just think of them as a dog” line far too many times, and I’m sorry people, I am not accepting that they are just like the canine friends among us.
Dogs are sweet, granted, but goats, no.
I swear they can tell I don’t like them too. As soon as I am anywhere near one, they seem to glare and stare longingly at me. I then end up embarking upon a staring competition with it, until I give up, back down and get as far away as possible in case I get eaten alive.
Okay that’s a bit over dramatic, but my phobia is real and as much as I accept it’s not the norm and my friends think I’m a little bonkers because of it, I can’t help it, I hate goats.
I’m not saying I’d ever hurt one because I wouldn’t but the goats know the drill, they stay out of my way and I’ll stay out of theirs.